Wholly Yours

Unbelievable it is to find myself where I am. It was just a blink ago that I sat on the floor of my college duplex wondering how good of a teacher I would be. A year later I've discovered so many things about myself and about others. This world is not as kind as I had hoped it would be. Not all parents have their children's best interests in mind, and not all children know respect for the only parents they will ever have. Teachers talk behind each others' backs, and students will do anything to prove themselves worthy of praise....even if only makes them look cocky or full of themselves.
I've seen the other end of the spectrum too: God has allowed me to talk of my beliefs and what I stand for in life. My students have carried me through the passing of my friend. My parents have supported me even when I was wrong. My errors have been surrounded by forgiveness and grace, and I have been blessed to have Christian parents taking me under their wings. Somehow in the midst of it all I've been labeled a "good" teacher. I'm not sure what that means. I've not felt worthy of such a title. There is so much I didn't teach the children. There is so much I want them to know. I feel they aren't prepared to face the world, and I fear I've let them down. Unable to take it back, I must swallow my pride and continually surrender my ability and my life to God alone. All glory belongs to Him and Him alone.
Although I never imagined this time in my life to be what it is, I'm happy to be 100% God's. There's nowhere else I'd rather be.